First things first, happy solstice to everyone! While I had planned on making this a solstice-themed blog post and sharing it yesterday, a debilitating migraine delayed my efforts. So, here I am, writing on Saturday instead.

But my theme remains unchanged. As we celebrate the longest day of the year, the zenith before we start our journey down the latter half of the wheel of the year, I find myself at a similar juncture. Just as the days will soon begin to shorten, I, too, am realizing that I’ve reached the height of what I can manage and need to start scaling back.

When I relaunched my blog in the spring of 2023, I was struggling creatively. Everything I wrote felt forced, and I wasn’t engaging in any other creative activities. The goal of this blog was to widen my creative horizons and seek new outlets to help my creative juices flow. Over the past year, I’ve immersed myself in various activities: free writing, reading books that truly interest me (not just because I feel like I should read them), doing paint-by-number, designing on Illustrator, using Canva more extensively, and doodling again. These new ventures were in addition to my existing hobbies of gardening, hiking, and photography. I also recently began volunteering with a local animal rescue to help with their marketing initiatives.

All of these pursuits have been incredibly fulfilling. I feel more creative than I have in years, with ideas flowing faster than I can keep up. However, while my creativity has flourished, my energy levels and social sensitivities have remained constant. I struggle to engage in social activities and I’m usually too exhausted to pursue my hobbies after a full day of work. This means most of my creative projects (most of my life, really) are relegated to the weekends.

Every weekend, I face a long list of to do’s and wants, so only the most urgent tasks tend to get done. This constant juggling act leaves me feeling overwhelmed and behind, triggering stress and migraines like the one that kept me from getting this blog out sooner.

I recognize that everything I’m doing is by choice, and I have the freedom to step back at any time. However, knowing my own boundaries and when to say no has always been a challenge for me. Despite feeling overwhelmed, I’m genuinely happy with my activities and don’t want to give any of them up. I just can’t keep up with all of them.

So, I’ve decided to consciously scale back. By making a deliberate decision to scale back, I hope to feel less guilty when a hobby falls by the wayside. I’m not going to “quit” any of them, but I will stop setting rigid goals for most of them.

One exception is my writing. I submitted a grant application earlier this year for funding to get the Wilderlands manuscript edited. If I receive the funding, I need to ensure the manuscript is ready for an editor during the grant period, making this goal a priority. Therefore, I will focus less on other goals (such as getting certifications or meeting specific skill milestones) and engage in those activities only when I have extra time and only for the happiness they give me. This is especially challenging since many of these hobbies are relevant to my work, and putting them on the back burner could mean missing out on professional opportunities. Nonetheless, I know this is the right decision for me at this moment.

Taking my cue from the solstice, I acknowledge that I’ve reached the zenith of my ability to juggle various tasks. While it’s been wonderful, it’s not sustainable. It’s time to dial things back gradually, embracing a cyclical approach like the seasons. Just as nature requires periods of rest and renewal, so do we. Peak productivity cannot be maintained indefinitely; we must allow ourselves time to rest and rejuvenate.

Happy solstice, and may we all find balance in our own cycles of activity and rest.