I had started writing a different blog post for this week about why (in my semi-academic opinion) women are “so into witchy shit” these days. Still, unsurprisingly I had so much to say on the subject that it started to get out of hand. I almost wrote my master’s thesis on a similar subject, so I expect I’ll continue to chip away at that and maybe even add some sources before it ever sees the light of day. There’s a lot to be said about patriarchy, and colonialism, and capitalism. It’ll take a while to sort it all out.

In the meantime, it seemed like a good time for another update on my “home stretch” novel writing, because I seem to have become stuck in an endless loop. Every time I finish a chapter, I uncover even more story that needs to be covered before the conclusion. And so with each chapter finished, the manuscript grows by a chapter, leaving that end goal forever equidistant from my current standing.

In some ways this is a good thing. My ending was definitely the least fleshed out part of my novel planning that I went in with. So I take this as a sign that not only are my characters getting fleshed out enough to tell the story, but I’m getting to know their world well enough to navigate these minor details.

But at the same time, I had been hoping to finish the manuscript in June. I’ve been writing this manuscript since April 1st now. Technically, I started work on this novel back in 2020. It’s all been bubbling up inside my head for years, and I just want to be out where I can see it as a physical thing! But of course giving in to my impatience doesn’t result in a decent first draft.

And so I slog on, suspended, as if in a dream, constantly grasping for that end goal just beyond my reach. It is here that I remind myself that storytelling and writing makes me happier than anything else, even if it sometimes makes me very frustrated.

Plus it’s July. We’re just past the solstice, the black caps are ripe, I bumped my face into wild parsnips and didn’t break out into a massive rash, and plants are getting tall enough to start harvesting and experimenting with! There are many things to be celebrated.